Banana Republic
by JaneIsMyShepard
Summary: Another old fill for the kmeme. Reader beware. Femslash, packing, public sex, smut and bad humor. Liara honey, is that a banana in your pocket?


"Hey, those are mine T'soni!"

Shepard quickly closed the distance between herself and the asari. Gripping her hips playfully by the belt loops of the oversized cargo pants, she tugged Liara back into the warmth of her body, wrapping her arms around the good doctor's waist while littering a trail of kisses down her neck.

"Yours, Shepard?... The pants or my assets?"

"Mmmm… both." She tightened her grip and pressed her lips further down Liara's neck.

"What's the matter? You don't like?" she replied coyly and pressed her "assets" back into the Commander. A hint of a smile crossed her lips, as her brow scrunched up in mock offense.

"You know damn well I like." The Commander looked over Liara's shoulder and enjoyed the sight of the low rise of her cargo pants against the swell of Liara's hips reflected in the bathroom mirror. She tugged them lightly.

"I like them even better off… are you sure you really want to go out tonight?"

"Behave yourself." She slapped Shepard's hands away. "You'll appreciate it more if you have to wait... and maybe if you're good I'll have a little surprise for you."

"Liaaraaa… I hate surprises". Shepard pouted.

"You do not. You hate waiting for them."

"Liaaraaa… I hate waiting for surprises." Shepard corrected herself.

Liara smiled and grabbed Shepard's hand pulling her towards the cabin door.

=======================  
After dinner they headed out onto the Presidium towards the theater. The new Blasto movie was showing and Liara had promised Shepard they would go see it, much as she hated low brow action films. They settled into the darkness of the back row as Shepard whispered her assurance that every theater on Earth utilized such seating arrangements solely for the purpose of young lovers groping each other in dark public places.

As the opening credits rolled Shepard's lips found Liara's cheek… and her jaw… and her neck… and that little spot right… _oh, goddess damn it._ Liara turned, her mouth crushing against her lover's.

Shepard's hands began to travel up the hem of Liara's shirt when she felt a hand clasp her figures and slowly guide them to the inside of her thigh instead. Suddenly, Shepard's hand stopped. Pulling from the kiss, a little wide eyed and breathless, a wicked grin spread across her face. "Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to…"

Liara shoved her playfully. "Surprise."

"So that's why you're in my pants."

"Not yet I'm not… but, I intend to be." She kissed Shepard letting her teeth graze the Commander's bottom lip.

"How did you manage to get that thing to stay down anyway?"

"I have many skills." Her biotics flared subtly.

"Mmmm… yes you do." Shepard pulled her in for another kiss. "That is so fucking sexy." She mumbled against Liara's mouth.

Shepard reached her hand back down against Liara's thigh, stroking the toy pressed tight against her leg. The repeated friction made Liara's back arch. "Sh-Shepard… pleeease… behave."

"I knew it… you kinky asari!"

Yes indeed, it was the sensation transmitting model they'd picked up on Omega. _Note to self, send thank you letter to Aria… again... and fruit basket._

"I meant it as an enticement for things to come," she said, slapping the Commander's hands away again. "The movie will be over in less than an hour and a half. I'm sure you can manage."

"Well, color me enticed and ready to come…" Hands wandered back down eagerly stroking until Liara arched her back again, this time spilling her drink down her shirt. Biotics were forgotten and the toy bobbed to attention as ice chips trailed their way down, melting between the crease of warm and ample breasts. Feeling more than a little embarrassed and suddenly quite aware of her nipples as well as her mono-gendered hard on, Liara shot out of her seat and headed for the restroom. A snickering Commander followed only a few steps behind.

Liara rubbed the front of her shirt briskly with a paper towel and tried to liberate the remaining ice particles from underneath it as the Commander took the opportunity to snake her arms around the asari's waist. Her gaze traveled to the image reflected in the mirror. "You look a little cold." Shepard cupped her hands over the taunt nipples, giving them a little squeeze as she went. An elbow jabbed her in the ribs.

"This is your fault."

"My fault? I didn't stuff that thing in your pants. However, I am still willing to make it up to you…"

Shepard slid her palm down Liara's stomach, down to the button holding her pants up, and once the button was disarmed, further down, stroking, long and slow with warm steady hands. She watched the image of Liara's face reflected back at her, eyes closed, concentrating on the pleasure of the moment and she felt warmth and desire begin to pool in the pit of her stomach, making her folds slick and full.

Their reverie was interrupted by the sound of voices and footsteps making their way down the hall. Shepard pulled her lover into the nearest stall and locked the door behind them. They stood in cramped quarters, Liara's back pressed to the door and the back of Shepard's knees pressed into the lip of the privy.

"Join with me," she whispered.

"What?!.." Liara began to protest aloud.

"Shhhhh…" A finger against her mouth silenced the argument. It was soon replaced by soft lips as she acquiesced to Shepard's request.

_"Can you be quiet?" _

Before Liara could answer, Shepard was seated in front of her, tugging her pants well past her hips, and wrapping her hand around the shaft of the toy as it bobbed precariously. Liara watched thoughtfully and found herself growing increasingly aroused at the prospect of watching her lover take her in that beautifully warm mouth.

_"I don't know how good I'll be at this, but I'll try like hell…"_ Shepard smiled a little sheepishly as she glanced up and locked eyes.

_"Gold star?" _

_"Who taught you that, Li?"_

_"Williams and Traynor have a running bet… it seems Traynor has won."_

Shepard smiled, her eyes flashing mischief, before she closed them and took Liara into her mouth. Warm lips slid down Liara's length with deliberate and aching slowness while a firm hand stroked the base to make up the difference. Her tongue slid effortlessly back and forth along the underside until she pulled back slightly and swirled it around the head, kissing and sucking as she went. Her face was the image of tender concentration, putting every pleasure her mouth was worth into that moment. She moaned a contented sigh that sent a subtle hum across her lips and reverberated down the shaft to Liara's core.

_"You're very good at that…"_

Shepard sent waves of images from a dozen sleepless nights spent searching Liara out with her tongue. Soft damp folds and enveloping warmth, licking and sucking a tender nub into a swollen frenzy, the scent of arousal, the delicious well of liquid sex, and the rolling of hips as muscles contracted and nerve endings ignited into a radiating glow of love and lust and relief.

_"…Not so different… I love taking you in my mouth. Love making you come so hard you can't stand up. Nothing makes me harder or wetter. I love knowing how good it feels when you suck me off while I'm wearing this… how good you feel right now. Besides… I learned the best tricks from watching you."_

Liara closed her eyes tightly and tried not to moan. Both hands found a resting place on the Commander's head, fingers tangled in her hair, urging her onward as hips began to rock in time with the bobbing of Shepard's head. So hot, so wet… the pressure, the friction, the pull of her mouth drawing in, and that maddening velvet tongue… teasing, stroking… and her lips… full and soft… wrapped around, pressing, kissing…

_"Goddess that mouth…"_

Shepard quickened her pace from a deliberate provocation to satisfying gratification. She reached her other hand up and pressed her palm between Liara's legs, rocking her hand against the end of the toy that was situated deep inside her lover's body. Her other hand and mouth worked the cock furiously as she felt Liara's eyes on her, watching the performance, enjoying the sight of this extension of her swollen throbbing clit being buried deep inside Shepard's eager mouth.

_"I'm so close… so.._

_"I know you are. I know… Come for me. I want to taste you. Right in my mouth…"_

Shepard looked up, watching intently, as her last thoughts sent Liara tumbling over the edge. Eyes shut tight, mouth slightly agape, her breath coming in short bursts as her hips thrust forward and her back slammed into the door, fingers curled tightly in Shepard's hair as each contraction of muscle sent a warm flow of liquid across the Commander's tongue, coating it in a taste she recognized as wholly and completely Liara. Echoes of pleasure from their joining traveled throughout Shepard's body and made her already wet and pulsing center ache with anticipation.

Shepard eased her mouth back and forth, slowly, licking the last drops of moisture and nursing the sensitive shaft between her lips. She reveled in sending a few lasting jolts up Liara's spine, before rising to support her body, as her lover's knees threatened to buckle. Minutes passed bathed in afterglow, while hot breath and torrid whispers played out across each other's necks.

Liara grasped the Commander's belt buckle and loosened it with a quick tug. Her hands traveled down soft skin and firm muscle until the tips of her fingers reached past the waist band of Shepard's underwear and sunk themselves between moist swollen folds. She slid her fingers back and forth tempting the firm nub from under its protective hood before plunging her fingers deep inside the silken walls, searching out that deliciously sweet spot.

_…inside you. I want to be inside you... _

She accentuated the words with the thrust of her fingers before drawing them back and taking them to her mouth, closing her eyes, and savoring the taste. First one and then the other as Shepard looked on, dumbstruck.

_God, Li… just looking at you… you make me want to do stupid stupid things, even more stupid than usual... like fucking you in the bathroom stall of a packed movie theater…_

At that Liara forced Shepard's back against the door and worked one leg of her pants off. She slid the cock between those slick pouty lips, covering it with the Commander's wetness. Shepard leaned back hard and angled her hips as Liara drew a bare leg up around her waist. She teased Shepard's entrance before plunging the full length inside. The liquid heat drawing her in deeper as muscles tightened and skin met skin.

The moans were unfettered now as the dull pounding against the stall door took on a regular cadence. Shepard gripped Liara's hips pulling her in with each motion as Liara braced herself against the door and pulled the Commander's thigh more tightly around her.

Their breathing was labored as limbs tangled and mouth, teeth, and tongue felt purchase in lips and shoulders and throats. The sweat of their passions, a plane of cooling sheen against tensed muscle and sinew. There were no words now only the shallow grunts of effort and the slap of skin on skin mixed with the burning red hues of conscious thought. Painted colors that screamed of "more" and "harder" until practicality won out in the face of convention.

Liara released Shepard's leg and pulled her down into a sitting position. This, this was better… much, much better… The weight of her lover's body colliding with her was intoxicating, hips rolling, leaning back, as she tightened her grip on the Commander's firm ass, guiding her up and down along the length of the toy. She filled her mouth with the warm flesh of Shepard's breasts as the hypnotic rhythm of their fucking marked the seconds like a ticking clock.

The bathroom door opened again.

"Is uh, everything alright in there? We've had a few concerned patrons mention that it sounds like someone might be in some kind of pain."

*whump whump whump whump whump*

_"Don't… stop… fuh.. king… me… Li… don't… you… dare… stop… I… got… this… ungh…"_

"Ma'am official Spectre business. I'm…ungh… in the middle of detaining a suspect. She ran in here to hide and… ungh… she's resisting arrest. This will all be over momentarily and I'll have this… ungh… rogue out of your establishment."

* whump whump whump whump whump*

"Do you always work with one pant leg off?"

*whump whump whump whump whump*

"Uh… no ma'am. The suspect is a bit… ungh…. unruly and I've uh… had to…"

*whump whump whump whump whump*

"I can smell your lover's pheromones…"

*whump whump whump whump whump*

"Sooo… you're an asari then…?"

*whump whump whump whump whump*

"Yes… yes I am."

*whump whump whump whump whump*

"Uh…. Very well, carry on then ma'am."

The last words Shepard heard as the door swung shut were some unintelligible phrases about humans, perverts, and C-Sec. All in all it sounded like a good time on a Saturday night, but she didn't think Liara would agree.

*whump whump whump whump whump*

_"I believe Williams has a phrase for what just happened there, Shepard."_

_"Oh yeah?"_

_"I believe the correct term is… fail"_

_"Li, stop thinking with that head and fuck me with the other one…"_

Unperturbed by the urgency of the situation Shepard reached down and stroked furiously at her slick folds focusing her concentration on her swollen nub. She ground her hips down, clenching at the material of Liara's shirt working harder, faster. They only had a few more moments before she found herself in the bad kind of handcuffs. Not an impressive finale to an otherwise fabulous performance. Liara took a moment to assess the predicament before leaning forward and pressing her lips to the Commander's ear. Even though they were still connected by the meld, something about speaking the words aloud, the soft warm breath, and coarseness of her language never failed to elicit the most pleasant responses from her lover.

"I know you like getting caught… I can feel it in you. You like being my tawdry little bathroom slut. Keep rubbing… Just like that. Show me you want it. You like taking my cock deep inside you, tightening your muscles around it… I know you want me to come inside you. Feel my hot liquid fill you up..."

The Commander groaned and buried her face against Liara's neck, licking and nipping at the tender folds. Panting heavily, she replied in her own breathy whisper.

"I want you to come inside me, almost as much as _you_ want to come inside me… _I_ can feel that in _you_… And then maybe when you're finished you can get on your knees and tell me what it tastes like when we're together…"

At that Liara grasped Shepard's hips pulling her down as she thrust upward, burying the shaft as deeply as it would go. Her back went rigid as her hips jerked and a hot stream of velvet honey coated the Commander's inner walls. Shepard tightened around her, milking every last drop, every shiver from Liara's spine, before the overpowering sensations of Liara's juices, warm and flowing down from inside her own body, sent Shepard spasming into orgasm. She held tightly, her cries muffled against Liara's neck, until both their bodies stilled themselves in a sated heap leaned hard against the bathroom stall.

"Li, we have to get out of here…"

"I blame this on you Shepard… Goddess you're a mess."

"I'm getting used to it and anyway I'm not the one with hard on and a wet spot in her lap…"

"With a…"

Liara glanced down. First the shirt, now the pants.

"Geez T'Soni, I can't take you anywhere…"

Shepard pulled Liara to her feet, kissing her lovingly as she adjusted the front of Liara's pants and tied her sweatshirt around her waist. She pulled her own pants back on and gave another kiss to the corner of Liara's mouth before raising an eyebrow.

"Just until we make our escape… you can take them off when we get back to my cabin."

"You hope I will Shepard."

"I know you will T'Soni. Your tawdry little bathroom slut is still hungry..."

Blue cheeks turned violet as Shepard pulled her towards the door. Shepard surveyed the hall from a crack in the door. The exit was about 20 yards down the hall and to the right. She raised her fist and gestured for Liara to head towards the outside while she covered the door.

"Go go go!"

Liara crouched low and bolted towards the door. As it swung shut, Shepard spied a distinctly Turian shadow and initiated the cloaking device on her omnitool. She slid past the door and against the wall, letting it close as subtly as possible. Then she sprinted down the hall and took up an observational position behind a trash can half way to the exit. As C-sec entered the bathroom she closed the distance to the exit and slipped outside without drawing attention to the swinging door. Once more she gathered her legs into a sprint as she slung a dazed Liara over her shoulder and ran towards the park.

Out of breath, Shepard stopped and lowered Liara onto the grass once she was sure they were alone. She disengaged her tactical cloak and crawled up alongside her exasperated asari.

"I'm not sure if you're just incredibly sexy or incredibly foolish Shepard… but one thing I am sure of is that you are as subtle as a turd in a punch bowl."

"Wait… what? Lemme guess, Williams?"

"No, Tali actually."

"What the hell does Tali know about turds or punch bowls she shits inside a… never mind. I didn't need to ask… I did hear sexy in there though, right?"

"Mmmhmm… Take me back to the Normandy."


End file.
